Wednesday, November 12, 2014

A dull ache of loss

Nothing is more permanent than change. Except death. Death is forever. If you have a faith that says otherwise then I envy you, sort of, and faith is good. But to me, death is final.

All of my major losses have been pretty minor compared to this one.

My Uncle Mac died, that was real. Robbie died skydiving - a tragedy. My compadre Andre returned to Chile and my good mate Michael went to Queensland.

But the dull ache of remembering that my mum won't see this blog, or pick up if I call that number or be there to give a shit when it's all about me. Fuck, nothing compares to that.

I suppose it is now the new normal. I thank God that I have my sister. An echo of what once was. Forget that there have been times where we couldn't stand to share the same air.

All small stuff. It had been the same with Mum at times. We've just gone with it and been lucky that the ace of spades didn't flip when we hated each other. Luck is a blessing.

Nothing is more permanent than change. Except death.

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